Saturday, July 30, 2016

We all love a lot of people's traits at the same time

We're supposed to love persons, one person to be precise in our modern societies. I think we love  different people's traits.


You’ll love the charisma of one, they kindness of another, the beauty of another, they eyes of another, they craziness of another, the smell of another, the voice of another, the skin of another, the imagination of another, the facial expression of another, the intelligence of another, the deep generosity of another, the wisdom of another, the smile of another, the style of another, the accent of another, the sense of humor of another, etc.
We all love a lot of people's traits at the same time, and not traits from one person only - our significant one.
We don't call it love because it's a cultural taboo to use this word outside of the classic schema where you love one person at a time. I don't see other words, though. Like is too weak to qualify a sentiment that can be very intense.

Note that love is one way, loving someone doesn't imply any reciprocity. You don't have to say it, write it, to possess the other person, to touch her, to sleep and live with her. People often mix love, reciprocal love and the desire to be with


I imagine we all tend to be in a relationship with a person having a lot of traits you love and - the most important point - who loves a lot of traits of you too. That's not all at all.
To move from pure love to relationship, you have to pass 3 - often non-explicit - steps:
1 - You need a common desire to be together,
2 - an alignment regarding what together meaning (examples: seeing each other sometimes, living together, doing everything together, having a family, being together forever, etc.),
3 - and a common will to satisfy this desire (here, context is important: work, families, age, past experiences, kids, social pressure, customs, etc.)

These 3 steps will be constantly challenged during the relationship.

Quote from Thich Nhat Hanh, quite famous Vietnamese Buddhist monk to finish:
We really have to understand the person we want to love. If our love is only a will to possess, it is not love. If we only think of ourselves, if we know only our needs and ignore the needs of the other person, we cannot love.

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En Français :

Dans nos sociétés modernes, on est supposé aimer des personnes, une personne pour être précis. Je pense qu'on aime des caractères de difféerentes personnes.


Vous allez aimer le charisme de l'un(e), la gentillesse d' un(une), la beauté d'un(e) autre, les yeux d'un(e) autre, la folie d'un(e) autre, l'odeur d'un(e) autre, la peau d'un(e) autre, l'imagination d'un(e) autre, le visage d'un(e) autre, l'intelligence d'un(e) autre, la générosité d'un(e) autre, la sagesse d'un(e) autre, le sourire d'un(e) autre, le style d'un(e) autre, l'accent d'un(e) autre, etc.

Nous aimons tous des caractères de différentes personnes au même moment, et pas JUSTE les caractères d'une personne, son/sa conajoint(e)
Nous n'appeleons pas cela amour car c'est un tabou culturer d'employer ce mot hors du classique schéma où on aime une personne à la fois. Il n'y a pas d'autres mots plausibles.

Noter que cet amour est unilateral, l'amour n'implique aucune réciprocité. Ce n'est pas nécessaire de le dire, de l'écrire, de posséder la personne aimée, la toucher, coucher avec ou vivre avec. On confond souvent l'amour, l'amour réciproque et le désire d'être avec.


J'imagine qu'on tend tous à être en couple avec une personne qui a beaucoup de caractère que l'on aime et qui - point très important - qui aime beaucoup de ses propres caractères.
Mais ce n'est pas tout. Pour passer de l'amour au couple, il faut passer 3 étapes, rarement explicites:
1 - il faut un désir commun d'être ensemble
2 - ête d'accord sur ce qu'être ensemble signifie (ex: se voir parfois, vivre ensemble, tout faire ensemble, fonder une famille, ête ensemble pour toujours, etc.)
3 - et un désilr commun d'assouvir ce désir. le contexte est important : travail, famille, age, expériences passées, enfants, pression sociale, coutumes, etc.

Ces 3 étapes vont être constamment remises en cause durant la vie de couple.

Citation de Thich Nhat Hanh, célèbre moine Boudhiste Vietnamien:
On doit comprendre la personne que l'on souhaite aimer. Si votre amour est uniquement un désir de posséder, ce n'est pas l'amour. Si on ne pense qu'à soi, si on ne connais que ses propres besoins mais qu'on ignore celui de l'autre, on ne peut aimer.

Monday, July 25, 2016

What should we do to protect our health from the air pollution killing spree?

When people are cold, they wear a scarf and gloves. A bit more than 1 000 people die from hypothermia in the US per year.
When they are hot, they wear a cap. Heatwave can kill a lot sometimes, 70 000 during a recent one in Europe.
To protect their feets, they wear shoes. (Did not found stats saying that not wearing shoes kills, sorry).
To do bicycle, they wear a helmet. To do motorbike, they have a motorcycle vest and a helmet. Half of 1,25 million people dying on roads each year are driving motorbikes, bikes or walking persons.

Terrorism is a huge society issue. 32 000 people were killed from it in 2014.
Malaria killed 438 000 persons in 2015. We fight hard against this.
Same thing for AIDS. 1,2 million people died from it in 2014.
Same thing for bad water, 2 million die from it every year.

What do we do to protect our health from pollution?  6,5 million people could die every year due to air pollution (or 5.5, another source)

As individuals, almost nothing.
We don't adapt our lives to avoid pollution peak (how many runners run in the middle of dangerous peaks).
We don't wear masks. Except some bikers, I've rarely seen people with masks, except in Asia, but they are not anti-pollution masks.
We rarely have an air filtering system at home.
We don't track peaks and monitor where we live's air quality using apps such as Plume.
Some laws are supposed to protect us and lower pollution. That's it.

What should we do, from easy to complex:

  • Install Plume and activate notifications.
  • Avoid doing sports or going out with babies during pollution peaks.
  • Buy an air filtering device at home.
  • Wear a mask when you do sport or when pollution is high, even if it's a bit strange.
  • Live where pollution is low (already asked Plume guys to build a system of label to distinguish cities making efforts to limit air pollution :p)
  • Do lobbying to reinforce anti-air-pollution actions.

Sunday, July 24, 2016

Boring real life vs amazing virtual realities

With our phones we're connected to thousand of people, we can order stuff, get super interesting content, see what's happening everywhere, create companies, fight for causes, help people, share love and get love.

Tomorrow, virtual reality will let us enter in fantastic parallel dimensions.

In comparison, our real life will be so boring.

That's why people check their phone constantly, even with friends or significant ones.
They're just bored. They're just attracted by more exciting content, more impressive dimensions.

The world waits for you - Facebook friends, Twitter followers, Whatsapp groups, Tinder dates, Snapchat friends, Pokemon Go pokemons and hunters- why losing time chatting about ordinary stuff with a handful of friends in an average café.

Why doing one thing in real life when you can at the same time do tons of things at the same time online, chatting with 10 persons at a time, playing and maybe working a bit too.

Why going out to do somewhat cool things while so many amazing things happen online and soon in VR (virtual reality) environments.
You can see a local music band walking 10 minutes or see superstars with a VR helmet. What will you choose?
Why watching a conference of local experts in your neighbourhood when TedTalks with super amazing speakers are free?
Note that Pokemon adds another flavor: it obliges people to go out and move to do stuff on their mobile.

Virtual realities will soon challenge reality.
A lot of people will surely prefer to be in the Matrixes than being in their reality.
Moreover, to have a cool VR you need a software. To have a cool reality, you need money, a lot.

Will reality by a luxury thing for rich people only while poor people escape in VRs?